Gross
August 29th, 2003Today was the first day of Gross Anatomy, the (in)famous course all first year med students have to take. A few days ago we had lengthy lecture telling us what to do and what not to do (to or with our cadaver), and the sorts punishment we’d get if, for example, we took parts out of the lab or brought visitors into the lab…so we figured we’d head down to the Gross lab immediately.
But no. Before we headed down, we had a Donor Recognition Presentation, which was like an “opening ceremony” of sorts to show respects to those who donated bodies to this program. It would have been a good idea had it been short and not religious, but it turned to be the complete opposite. Organizing and leading this 1 hour long (!) ceremony were two deans of religious affairs (who knew there was such a position anyway?) who passed out handouts filled with ridiculous poems, songs, and other essays. We then followed along as they chanted these words with such strange voice inflections that I felt as if I were in some sort of cult…a cult that honored the legs of cadavers for helping them “run fast” in life. At one point, they read through a creepy ass poem (in the loosest sense of the word) and we had to chant back after them, call-and-response style.
Anyway, not only did this ceremony probably not achieve what it intended to, but it actually made it hard to keep a straight face. As much as I didn’t want to smirk during a ceremony like this, I know I didn’t suppress all of it. What a shame…it was really a cheesy hour.
We finally headed off to the Gross lab for our first dissection, and seeing our cadaver for the first time was a little strange. We slowly took off all the layers of shrouds, sheets, and covers, and finally saw her body. We didn’t even take the cloth off her face, but it still caught me off-guard more than I expected. A few girls actually fainted (I’m sure it was a result of that ceremony, as it probably made them overly anxious).
The next three hours were spent dissecting the back. And I don’t exaggerate when I say we spent the vast majority of those hours skinning the body and trying to remove all the fat from the back. Fat, in case you are curious, is disgusting. Alive or dead. If nothing else, at least Gross Anatomy has already taught me to not get fat.
Also, at my request we named our cadaver Eleanor, in honor of a girl that I “liked” back in Baltimore. BTW, in case you’re thinking of commenting on this, don’t.